The past couple of months have been a learning experience, more so then usual. Things I have learned:
Letting go... moving on
I have learned that letting go and moving on remains the theme of life. I also learned that you meet new people and the first thing you do is let go and move on with those that have no good in mind.
Having said that, I try to be as good as possible in keeping in touch with friends, acquaintances and family. If I am not sick or working mad hours, I will take the time in the varied methods to communicate. Call, text, email and/or social media.
I have decided to take a rather large amount of steps back on reaching out. Granted, when I do people respond, but if I don't the weeks, months and even years will pass without a word. Instead of harboring on it, I make room for the new, the interested, those that want to be reached out to and want to reach out themselves.
That is of course after my hiatus. That time when I seek self. Look deep and see where I have gone wrong, where I could have done better. Replenish my soul so to speak. A time when instead of letting that dark cloud embrace me, walk right into it in silent battle.
New faces and places
I find that people at the start tell a whole lot, brand you friend and make expectations. I'm more relaxed then that. I mean, seriously, look at the name of this blog WATCHER'S notes. I rather watch, learn and see if this is an environment I would fit into. I don't have the want, inclination or effort to interrogate someone about their past or what makes them tick. I have that patience... the kind that listens, watches and learns who they are now.
In the end, your smile is there
I find it both amusing and terrifying how many people are bothered by someone's laughter, humor and/or positive attitude. Negativity is everywhere, why encourage it? While the frowners whine, I bring my smile. Sometimes it is painted on, other times heart felt but in the end it is still my smile.
Some people just need one of Minny Jackson's chocolate pie. For those that have not seen the movie (The Help), a maid made an interesting recipe of chocolate pie. Served it to the boss that fired her, treated her poorly and was unapologetic about any of it. I mean if you want to spend so much time bullshitting might as well have some of Minny's Chocolate Pie.
Have you ever heard the song In The End by Lincoln Park? I love it. Most especially this part:
I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn't even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn't even matter
I wouldn't say I agree, I mean, I tried so hard and failed, I got far and it mattered. I fell (as most know repeatedly) but I get back up, in the end.... it all matters. Who I am today is due to all I have done and been through. I no longer live in regret. I would relive my life... just the same. But, who I am today is not who I was yesterday or all the yesterdays before that. Actually I am no way near the person I was 10 years ago, 5 years ago, 1 year ago.
Bridget Jones Diary
Because I like me, just as I am!
There's a wonderful part to this movie where she sits at her dinner table with her closest friends and the man she crushes on, the one that told her 'I like you.... just as you are.' She had told her friends prior and they while at a bar stripped those words down and scrutinized it. At the dinner party, they raised their glass to her and told her they liked her 'just as you are'.
How many people will accept one another 'just as they are'? I've a good friend that has several bad habits, I like 'just as he is'. I've another friend, diva to the core I like her 'just as she is'. Granted some things about people will rub me the wrong way, but their differences is what I appreciate the most. I already hang out with me 24/7, why find another me?
Best Exotic Marigold Hotel - Finding the living out of the dying. This will be my next post under inspireYOU. Don't worry it will be much more inspirational and enlightening then it sounds. If you haven't watched the movies (Part 1 and 2 - Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel) then you should, there will be plenty spoilers in the blog, you've been warned.
Although the above has inspired me in many ways, I hope it has inspired you as well.
09/06/2015 - ~gracey castro