Despicable they......SUE! SUE I SAY!

You can't have a conversation these days without people suggesting to sue.
You also can't just give minimal detail, these days people want to know EVERYTHING and think you are antisocial for not complying.

I sprained my foot.  The inner side of the boot cracked and the really good gel sole I bought kept me from noticing.  After days of walking 20 something blocks for a project at work in freezing weather did not help.  The sleepless nights with stress from work and personal life, did not help.  Basically I was running on low and numb.

By the time I found that there was something seriously wrong my foot was double the size and the healing time was extended to weeks.

17, that's how many people told me to sue the boot company.

During this time I was driving to work since the Dr said the commute was out of the question.  Actually my son drove.  One day we went over a pot hole that destroyed the tire, hub and rod.

6, that's how many people told me to sue the highway.  There would have been more but not many knew I was driving in.

Pretty much everyone had unwanted advice ranging from natural foods for inflammatory foot to what type of pain killers to ask for.  None of these people have any type of medical degree or culinary schooling.

Long gone are the days of easy conversation.
What happened to your foot?
Oh, I sprained it.
Gee, too bad, I hope it gets better quickly.
Thanks.

There, conversation done, on to better topics.

No one offered a ride to the Dr.  A ride to work.  A ride to the train.  Just a lot of useless unwanted advice.  Heck I was immobile for 3 days, I got a lot of advice but no soup or sandwich.

It took an old co-worker that I hadn't seen in 5+ years to offer to take me about to get the tire issue resolved.  No questions asked, just helped me get around and get the car situated.

Long gone are the days of caring and doing something just because we are human and caring.

In this economy it does shock me that people still use the 'just sue' advice.  In this day of instant knowledge it amazes me that people think anyone needs medical or food advice.

I am just about sick of the 'I eat well and only natural foods' people.  Fanatics!  Judgmental tree huggers.  A co-worker one day announced that he was going to out live us all (all co-workers), because he eats well and does push ups every few hours.  Wouldn't it be a hoot if he died of something completely unrelated to food?

I am just about sick of the know it alls 'Did you do this.. did you try that...did you did you did you' SHUT UP! already.  I was not born yesterday.  I have survived this far without you!

I am sick of the not on the top of the list people 'Why didn't you call me? Why didn't you ask....'  If you are not calling me, then it's pretty sure that we are not communicating and therefore why the hell would I think to call you.  Furthermore, if I am in drastic pain and putting myself in a coma with pain killers, chances are I can't call anyone.  If I eventually call you and update you, just LISTEN!  Refer to conversation above.

I am sick of the self proclaimed IN people 'You should see this Dr.  You should go to this specialist.'  DIDN'T you HEAR ME, I WENT to a DR and SPECIALIST!  Yours isn't the only one!

Saving the best for last.  The I know every way to get over people 'Oh great, you can go on disability.  Get notes and take a long period off.'  That these people have jobs is the shock of a lifetime.  That THEY are the reason the rest of us suffer escapes their mentality.  That THEY are the reason few can afford insurance, co-pay or even medication escapes them.  Actually I think they don't care.  Thieves!  No other way to put it.

Me?  I just want to heal, pay my dues and keep dreaming of a peaceful day.  Until then I take the moments I can gather and wish for the best.  Oh...and keep dreaming of conversations worth having, that is when people actually let you finish talking these days.

AndMore... Commuting is WAR!

Come along with me, let's walk and begin the 'Commute'.


First you must prepare for battle.  Mentally put on your shield, your helmet and make sure your sword is not dull.  Stand tall and hold your head up smiling will get you killed.


The walk to the first train is a short one, thanks to my new abode.  The wait however can be short or quite long depending on how well the NJT lights are working that particular day.  This is the only train you will find a seat on, take one quickly and don't look at anyone, this train harbors the mean spirited, you will see most of them at the end of the day when we return.  They will be meaner.


Five stops later and a packed train gets us to Secaucus which is a maze of humans shuffling along.  Zombies look livelier.  The departure/arrival signs are old, the machines that collect payment and ticket are new.  The workers stand in the way, no one knows why.  Just follow the mass, they are all going to NY.  Always follow the mass.  Go up two flights, turn a couple of times, don't slow down you will be stampeded.  Go down two flights and stand in the middle of the platform.  You will not know until the last minute whether the train will arrive on the left or the right.  You WILL not get a seat, don't even try, your goal is to get ON that train.


When the train arrives don't worry if you don't know where to go, it doesn't matter.  The MASS push you along, you are squeezed within strangers whether you want to or not.  A husband wishes they could get that close to you at least once a week.  Don't stand still in the train, find a spot.  One against a wall or lean in a corner.  DO NOT STAND IN THE MIDDLE.  The perverts and the angry ones are always there, touching as if by accident....it's not accident.  There will be shoving as if by a force unseen. Keep your head down, don't look at anyone.  It will just start a feud.  Just rest while standing our trip is nearly half over.


When the train arrives NY PENN Station don't look left or right, just aim your eyes on the train door.  No need to concentrate on where you are going, the herd will shove and trap you to the one direction...the escalator.  If you are lucky it will go quickly with minimal body damage.  Now brace yourself, we will have to go up another flight of stairs and walk a long corridor with hundreds of people.  The main exit is another flight, take them quickly or you'll be trampled.  Once at the top move quickly to the left and from there it is two blocks to the subway.  When we cross the street just hurry and yes...people will intentionally aim for you from the opposite direction.  Just push through.


There!  You see, we made it to the subway.  Don't give the peddlers money or you'll go broke in a couple of days.  All kinds are in there from the mother with the baby asking for milk money, the man with expensive jeans and sneakers saying he has been out of work for a year (he's been saying it for 3years) to the singers and dancers putting on a 10 second show.  Just look down.  Try to get a seat but don't bank on one.  It doesn't matter if you're in front of the train door, once it opens people will push you out of their way.  Everyone thinks the same.  I MUST GET A SEAT.  Especially those on the train for one stop, those are the worst, they will literally shove you over.  It's five stops to our exit, just look down and don't use any electronics.  I have seen someone punched in the face for their device.


Here we are!  Now we only have to walk 10 blocks to reach work.  The upper east side is another world.  Crossing the street here is like the Spartans at the start of battle.  You must reach the corner through dog walkers, nannies and other people getting to work.  Just look ahead and aim for speed.  Once at the corner there will be a stare down.  Those on the other side are warning you with looks that they intend to trample you, you must stare back viciously, if you are lucky they fear you more then you fear them and once in the middle of the street they will move out of the way.  You won't be able to walk around as it will be like a wall of people.  GOOD LUCK!


WAIT! There is a particular corner where a female cop directs traffic.  Watch her closely as she only cares about the cars, there have been many near misses with people crossing while paying attention only to the light.  Watch her as well.

LOOK!  We are almost there!  The gates to the campus!


Well?  I hope you fared well.  Now let's sit at our desk and take deep breathes to calm ourselves, our day has only just begun.  Happy 9AM, we get to do that commute all over again at 5 and the people are tired and even meaner.

Thanks for sharing that commute with me.  How did you like it?

AndMore...Officer... NJ... the thievery and lies... Oh Why?

I grew up in New Jersey, I have moved to a few states but always found my way back.  Much of the charm long gone I have come to realize this is not the state to retire in.  Not the state to afford insurance.  Not the state for fair treatment of people.

My darling niece came to visit with me and stayed a few days.  The time together was both special and refreshing.  On a Saturday night I drove her home.  Since we planned a few things for the day it would be late when we headed to South Jersey.  She lives about 2 hours away.  My poor knees can't handle long drives anymore, so a Saturday night would be just right to take it slow.

We got to her town in good time although the hour was late in the night, 10:30.  As soon as I got off the exit I noticed two things.

1.  There was no one on the road (Rte 9)
2.  There was however a cop in his car parked in the Supermarket lot across from the highway

I made the right out of the exit and went straight on Rte 9 for about 1/2 mile, the required left turn was coming up.  The cop was now coming along my right and passing me.  At the light is a lane just for left turns, then 3 more lanes to the right of it.  He was two lanes from me.  At the green light I made the turn.  Not too long after I saw the cop behind me and with the light on, considering no one else was on the road I could only guess it was for me.  I pulled over.  A young stiff cop approached, highly upset that I 'almost hit his car and only missed it by an inch'.  He repeated this several times.  I could only stare in shock at the blatant lie.  He asked 'didn't you realize'.........This is it.......the moment.....when you could ignite the situation further and contradict a cop clearly looking for a fight or just swallow your pride.  I swallowed until I choked.

The lie
Long story short, he asked for my paperwork, while reaching across to the glove compartment I kept a vigilant silent prayer 'please don't let him be a crazy cop looking for trouble.'  My niece said 'you didn't do that'.  I told her to be quiet.  In my nervousness I dropped some papers.  I had my license, registration but the insurance card was expired.  I knew that just days before I had put the new card in the compartment.  But I could not find it.  He took what I had in my hands and stormed off to his car.

My niece asked 'why don't you tell him he is lieing'.  I answered 'because he has a gun and an attitude, that's  a bad mix.'

I'm not one to use a race card, actually I detest that it gets thrown around a lot but the reality is there is racism.  It exists and sometimes it wears a uniform.

The second lie
'I'm going to let you go on careless driving and not give you a ticket.  I am giving you one for not having the right insurance card.  You can either go to court and fight it, which means coming back here and paying the ticket plus traveling cost or just go online and pay the $30 ticket fee.'  He smiled.

I thought 'he accuses me of almost hitting me but gives me a ticket for the card......whatever' at this point I just want to get my niece home and leave the South.

Lost faith
Turns out the ticket can not be paid online.  It is a mandatory court appearance, a $187 ticket plus court fees.  Miserable, lying cop!

Court
$11.25 in tolls and $30 in gas later....
You and any bag you carry are searched then ushered into a tiny court room that looks like it's falling apart.  The prosecutor aside from the search happy cops are the only ones in there.  A line is formed where everyone is given a choice by the prosecutor.  Your choices are the full payment of the ticket or a reduction plus court fees, you are encouraged in a round about way to take the guilty plea or you would have to return after pleading Not Guilty.  Most optioned Guilty.

The sad truth
The fees are a scam.  People with accidents paid less then me.
The process is the same as an assembly line at a factory.
That court must have met their monthly quota in that morning.
You just take the easy way once you realize even to fight for your right means traveling back and forth, paying an attorney and still hoping the Judge is in a good mood.
Court completely depends on a Judge's mood.

Conclusion
I hate South Jersey
It is sad when you both fear and despise the people who swear an oath to protect you
It is sadder yet when those people are pathological liars
I still spent over $100 just in reduced ticket and court fees
I couldn't head North fast enough

AndMore...Who watches the children? Who is the adult?

Daily I see this and still it amazes me.

The father walking the toddler to the daycare.  The toddler on a toddler scooter stopping and ranting.  You see him do nothing as the child does what she wants.  The street light about to change and she is standing still having a tantrum.  He stands there with her saying soothing words and apologizing to her.  People behind them shaking their heads as they pass them up.


The mother that allows the child to push her carriage.  Banging into people with mischief in her eyes.  The mother apologizing to those that are hit.  Soothingly begging the child to stop it.


The child that yells at the parent.  Stomping and angry whilst glaring at all that stare.  The parent soothingly asking him to stop.  Apologizing for having to ask him to keep on walking.


The teenager that gets out of the car while her mother is at a stop light.  Threatening to walk if the mother does not shut up.  The mother in despair soothingly agrees while begging her to get back in the car.

Who watches these children that rule themselves and their parents?  Who is the adult?

Speak to your children, explain why you want them to do things, be kind but firm.

These parents read those books and listened well.  Now look at them.  They are beaten and worn, begging for obedience and hating the world for thinking their off-springs as spawns.

Makes me think of a few people and characters:

Joffrey: I'll tell you what. I'm going to give you a present. After I raise my armies, and kill your traitor brother, I'll give you his head as well. ~The boy king of Game of Thrones



Tyler Hadley - beat his parents with a hammer then threw a party at the house.


Look, I really don't want to go to hell, but I can't stop my nature. I'm just a hateful person. ! Stewie Griffin of Family Guy


9 year old Arizona boy who killed his father and another man - 2009


Who watches the children?

AndMore...Commuting disasters, trust issues... hope.

Commuting disasters

If you are not following me on FaceBook then you have missed a lot concerning commuting.  I shall recap:
I moved to Clifton, a nice quiet part of the town... so close to the train station that if I sneeze the conductor can be heard saying 'Bless you'.

I have in the last two months - ended up in Ho-Ho-Kus (again, who names a town Ho-Ho-Kus?) where I believe the only dealership there is BMW.
Ended up in Patterson where I believed I would not survive and would be found shot, stabbed and choked to death.
Not to mention the times I missed a stop and just stood in the train as it went to Upstate and back.

I hate commuting.  It's the price of a mortgage with minimal trains, long waits in between trains, nasty staff and no hope for improvement.  But... as people keep telling me 'at least I have a job'.

Trust issues

It's no secret I have trust issues.  I have been let down by people that one should never expect to be let down by.  I do however at times give it a try.  I've yet to be impressed.  I have however learned a few translations:

I'll be right there = Don't hold your breath loser, I'll get there when my important self feels like it.
I do listen = When your voice sounds better then mine, I WILL listen.
Things will get better = Who the F knows what to say to that mess. Things will get better sounds good.
I'm running late = I'm debating whether you're worth missing an episode of Two and a Half Men.
Did you get your hair done = Geez, I wish you would get your hair done.
Did you lose weight = Good grief, do you own a mirror?
I love you = I f_cked everyone else over, best to keep you on my side.
I'm OK, I don't need anything = Can't you SEE I want something?  Can't you just GUESS????
I'm really busy, but soon we will = Hell no! Hopefully you will forget you asked.

Hope

I have a bittersweet relationship with Hope, that twisted BYTCH!
I grant her access to my heart, allow her to whisper to my mind and she betrays me more then not.  Like a Stockholm Syndrome victim, I keep listening.  I keep hoping and reality becomes one with fantasy.

In summary

If it weren't for the reading, blogging, writing, cooking, and/or just laying on the sofa staring at the ceiling numb... I would go crazy.

AndMore...Gracey! Have a cookie!

Soooooo......

My boss brings in Polish cookies.  Harmless looking nickel size sugar cookies with chocolate covering.  EVERYONE here knows I am allergic to coconut.  The processed kind just sets my body up for a meltdown.  I popped one in my mouth and instantly felt it melting, I also felt my tongue going numb.  A large wad of cotton growing in my throat.

I run to the ladies room and spit the remnants out, stick my head under the faucet all while the new girl looked in horror.  My tongue was numb but I could feel it swelling. PAUSE

PAUSE REASON:  I hate the cold.  Freezing cold that is.  I just can't stand it in the least.  I cursed the weather last night as I waited for the crappy heater to kick in so I could shower.

END OF PAUSE:  I ran to my cube to get my coat, all the while thinking 'If I run to the hospital will I make it?  NAH!'  Seriously....who gets their coat in a crises?

I RAN.  Right out the door heading to the nurses building which you have to run the length of the parking lot (about 1/2 block) up a ginormous hill, then right for about 1/2 a block, up some stairs down a corridor make a right down a longer corridor and to the Nurses office.

I am out of breath, coat open and yelled COCONUT - BENEDRYL which in my mind sounded just right but in reality came out more like DADADUT - BANADUT!!!!  The nurses begin to ask me to repeat until one noticed the tongue.  High level of Benedryl was administered while they tried to coax me to a room to lay down.  I hadn't noticed I collapsed to the floor.  That was a long run with limited breathing.

They had me sit there and all the while I kept thinking what led me there.

Co-worker #1 - Gracey there's cookies there open the box and have one.
Co-worker #2 - The boss brought them in, go ahead.

I had yelled out to the boss to verify (yes, I have trust issues) but he ignored me.

After some more egging on I opened the box and took a cookie.

It hit me... they must be feeling like SHYT.  I grinned...well as much as a swollen tongue would allow.  It took a long time for me to feel my tongue, the drowziness advised the medication was working.  I looked up at the grinning nurses.  One which knows me well enough from all the visits says 'I guess you couldn't start the year without SOMETHING going wrong'.

Seriously????  WTF???? How about some bedside manners!!!  But... I had to smile - she had a point.

A couple of hours later aside from the sleepiness I began to feel like myself only with the fear of food.  I ate leftovers even though I had wanted to get a sandwich before the cookie attack.

I've learned a few things:
Don't eat SHYT where the box isn't written all in ENGLISH
My co-workers are un-intentional evil people (can you hate them if it's not intentional?)
When running to save your life forget the coat
Always carry benedryl even though it's been years since an allergy - you never know when a country will forgoe an important ingredient on the box
When your tongue goes numb anything you say sounds like a toddler learning to speak
Nurses really do laugh at patients
I hate Polish cookies

AndMore....Recipe for a Perfect Christmas

I have several Christmas movies I love, one in particular is Recipe for a Perfect Christmas*.  An admin assist for a magazine is given a trial run as a Food Critic, JJ has her hands full.

Her mother Leigh arrives un-expectantly into town.  A mother that previously preferred traveling about to sticking around, but is now in need of family.  You can't run from loneliness.

Alex, the restaurant owner that can't seem to cut a break.  The building owner is evicting him without giving him the chance to let the business grow.

He needs a Food Critic to advertise his restaurant, JJ needs to come up with THE food article to keep her promotion and her mother needs JJ.

Extraordinary story but similar emotions, I definitely can relate to this story on some level.

Trying to keep family together is at most exhausting and futile.  Trying to keep a positive attitude when the chips are down is....depressing.  Trying to put it all together is just a hope and a prayer.

JJ in the end, uses all her connections to get Food critics, magazine editors and customers to Alex's restaurant, on the eve of both Christmas and his eviction notice.  Her mother finally grows up and acts her age; she also helps out in saving the restaurant and her daughters love life.

Wouldn't it be great to make a few calls, friends and co-workers drop everything to save a business, a heart and a family?  Can it really only happen on the LMN channel?  I don't think so.  I have the most fantastical mind and it tells me anything is possible.

I believe that the right compassionate people in ones life can make any miracle a reality.  Her Recipe for a Perfect Christmas was to believe in others and not just herself.  My recipe?  It's to believe that there are people out there that can think about others.  That can say...to hell with my plans, someone needs me.  That can participate in helping another even if it meant nothing at all in return, but that glimmer of hope.

If my circle of friends were to be tested...I would say 3 out of many would be that Perfect Recipe.  That's not a lot of people, but imagine...if each knew 3 that knew 3 that knew 3 and so on; imagine the miracle that could be created.

A family - unknown could have Christmas, a failing restaurant would be full, a home would have a buffet of food, a can could be filled with singles and coins and in turn give someone a coat on a cold night.  Perhaps this fantastical mind can even picture that all would come true with that same band of 3 friends times 3 times and so on.

Now wouldn't that be the LMN movie of the year let alone of Christmas????

If you got that call...from a friend that needed help, would you think of 3 to call and make it happen?  Or is it the norm to just say...I can't, I'm busy, I'm broke, I have my own problems???  I hope not.  I hope you are the friend that starts the miracle wheel.

May my recipe for a Perfect Christmas be your reality of a Christmas should you find yourself in need of it.

*A Recipe for a Perfect Christmas - http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0480844/

AndMore...PATH to nowhere

It's a bitter cold morning.  I struggled to get up having been awakened at 4am by noise.  By the time I fell back to sleep that damn alarm clock was going off.  The radiators are supposedly broken so it was a freezing morning in the bathroom.  I bought a power strip to plug a small heater and the power strip doesn't work.

I suck it in and brace myself.  I leave and remember that the car is parked on a street that is cleaned this morning.  I find parking and start my 10 block walk to the PATH.  I get there and can't even get to where you enter the station and go up the stairs.  People everywhere. PATH is suspended, no power.

A slew of cops arrive to announce that the PATH may be closed for hours, to take a bus to Journal Square if you need to get to NY.  People ask where the bus is.  There is only one and it is delayed due to over capacity.  UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLE!!!!  I wait for an hour or so then go home.  Might as well work from home and try again later.

As I begin the 10 block walk back home I am alerting those I see that the PATH is closed.  After a few got verbally hostile I decided FUCK IT, let them find out the way I did.

I get home and only think of one thing - BATHROOM.  But the roommate is in there and normally takes about 2 hours.  I go back outside a few houses to a neighbor and use theirs.  I seriously miss having my own place.  I go back home and make myself a cup of coffee.  After a few work emails I decide to trek back to the PATH.

It's even colder out.  I am tired and on my 10 block walk back thinking 'WHY THE FUCK AM I NOT A SIZE ZERO WITH ALL THIS WALKING????'

I get to the PATH and it's packed, the trains are running but still catching up to loading all the people.  I finally board a train and am lucky to find a seat.  The man next to me decides to chat or actually BITCH. 'I had to walk 6 blocks to the train, stand for 2 hours and I'm late.'  He continued with the damages of MTA and PATH decisions.  After a while he noticed I only looked at him and said nothing he said 'I must be boring you'.  I said 'Not at all, I am just wondering why you would think complaining to any other commuter would be helpful.  I walked 30 blocks, stood for over an hour, when I get to NY I have another 10 blocks to walk and arrive to work HOURS late.  I seriously couldn't care less what other people feel about the hell of commuting'.  He got up and stood by the door.  It's getting harder to make friends.

I get to NY and board the NY train, a homeless person is begging for money because he is hungry.  He is slurring his way through the prepared speech.  I think to myself....I should have started my day with a drink or two.

I get to my stop and bundle up for the 10 block walk to work, feeling  more tired with each step. 'What is it all for'?  I kept asking myself all the way.  I sit and write this the whole time thinking...I could swim across the fucking river faster.

I have the rest of the day ahead of me and about 10% energy, this should prove interesting.

AndMore...some more friggin holiday cheer

You better watch out...
It doesn't matter if NJT or MTA have alerts, tweets or email.  You will find out there is a delay when you stand on a platform where no train arrives or find yourself in a tunnel on a stopped train for a long time.  Such was the case on the 30th.  The morning began with taking the PATH for one stop...then nothing.  PAUSE

PAUSE REASON - My trip for those that do not know.... 10 block walk to PATH train, one train to one stop and board another, several stops later get off walk 2 blocks to MTA, take train several stops later get off and walk another 10 blocks

END OF PAUSE, there it ended for a while.

The platform is quite narrow and once filled you are left with either staying on the escalator, if you are coming from the outside or diving off the platform.  People are more aggressive and there is no train in sight.  The costly monitors lie and say next scheduled train will arrive at xyz time (which passed) at track #xyz which is usually wrong.  When that happens those that think they are first in the train because they are at the edge of the platform, are now at the end of the crowd when the train actually arrives on the opposite track.

You better not cry...
It's just hell when finally a train arrives and you are at the end, nooooo where near to boarding and watch that train and the following get packed without you in it.  You finally get to the platform and are pushed, shoved and stampeded so that the ignorant, no class, uneducated bastards and bitches in the back get a seat.

Better not pout...
Ahhhhh.....finally the train is moving....3 minutes in and the dispatcher starts an announcement. 'This train will be making one and final stop..' (WAIT A FUCKING MINUTE!  ONE??? It goes to NY and makes several stops. WTF???)  I start pouting and realize as I look around I am not the only one.
'Due to a medical emergency we will stop at Hoboken and all must get off the train. You can get another train at the Hoboken station....'  (NO YOU FUCKING CAN'T, THIS TRAIN DOESN'T EVEN NORMALLY STOP AT HOBOKEN) 'and catch another PATH to 33rd, WTC or Journal Square (back to the beginning)'.

I'm telling you why...
You get to the Hoboken station and that platform is full, so when they open the train doors only half the passengers can get off.  The conductor is rushing out others (WHAT? WE SHOULD CLIMB ON TOP OF OTHERS AND DRY HUMP THEM WHILE WE WAIT????) without a care that there is no room.  Another 3 full trains later, I get to NY.  MTA is backed up. Of course it is.  It is tree lighting day - WTF do they do this on a weekday???? And the President is coming to town.  Why do we pay for that White House???  I wait for like EVER and take the R train, get off at my stop and walk the 10 blocks to work.  LATE!!!

Santa Claus is coming to town.
If only!!! Then I would kick his fat ass off the sleigh and make those reindeer's get me to work on time!

AndMore...The hunt for a key, Cujo kitty, the Firemen are coming

Initially Thanksgiving started pretty bad or at least the day before.  I went home with a migraine and just about given up with humanity.

In the late evening I went outside with a cup of coffee and a cigarette.  Time to relax and try to think of nothing and no one.

A beautiful little kitten was about 10 feet away.  The sweetest little purr could be heard.  He would wind about rubbing along the edge of the concrete stair from the house next door.  Clearly showing his discontent about the lack of affection.  I spent several minutes puckering up making the kiss kiss sound, a few hushed pssssssst while extending my hand.  He just teased taking a step then stopping, giving that slight sweet purr.  Eventually he came right up to me, I was sitting on the concrete stoop, extending my hand further so he could take a friendly whiff............when...........FUCKING CUJO came out of that kitten.  HISSING and SNARLING, swatting with extended CLAWS.  WHAT THE FUCK??????

I'm not ashamed to admit I picked up my cup and ran up the stairs, slamming the hallway door shut while out of breath.  The FUCKING MANIAC CAT was still out there HISSING.  BASTARD!!!

The next day was calm enough for a Thanksgiving, I treated myself to a matinee - TWILIGHT!!! Now that just perked me for the day.

FRIDAY - I visited my sister and in the evening she packed some food for me to take home.  I put the food in the car along with my purse and turned on the car to warm it up a bit.  I went back for a piece of cake that I forgot on the counter.  I walked to the car only to find I had locked it...with the car on...and all my things in it.  PAUSE...

PAUSE REASON - I have a Chevy Aveo, my recommendation to anyone is to NEVER get a Chevy Aveo.  The parts are from Mars.  It took 9 months to get a mirror to replace the cracked one (damn hooker) from the driver side.  NO ONE had the mirror, maybe the model from the  year before or after but not the 2009.  Well...try getting a fucking spare key for that car.  The car has an automatic transmission, anything else automatic stops there.  The key is not electronic, nor does it have any chip.  It is just a key.  Apparently locksmiths, Lowe's, Walmart and a ton of other places do not have the blank key to make a spare.  The dealer wants $125...for a key....for a FUCKING key.  END OF PAUSE

I panic, I have no spare, low gas and no way to get in.  I haven't renewed the AAA (was waiting on the new year, thank you recession).  I was seriously contemplating breaking a back window and asked my sister 'how much do you think that will cost?'  It's Black Friday and no 24 hour service available in the area.  I call a friend, for some reason he always has an answer and if not he has a way of calming my madness.  He said to call the police but not to dial 911.  PAUSE

PAUSE REASON - POLICE?????  Anyone who has read my writings for the past few years know I have a bad history with police.  Not that I am a criminal but I just don't have the best luck with interacting with them.  But... I need to get in my car.  END OF PAUSE

I suck in my cowardice at calling, straighten my back and I hand my sister her phone back (mine is in the locked car) and ask her to call (grins).  The police transfer her to the Fire Department as they are equipped to get into cars.

A few minutes later we hear the rumblings of a truck.  My sister says in a hushed voice 'oh shit, they are coming with the large fire truck.'  I say 'For my little car?'  Coming down the quiet, dark street is a rather large fire truck...loudly coming closer.

FIVE fire men get out of the truck and open all kinds of doors and panels.  One of them Le Captain I presume, walks over hands in pockets. "Oh, AND the car is on.' To which I replied....'well I wanted to warm up the car, it's really warm now, can you open it?' (See why it's not a good idea for me to call the cops?)

They come close to the car with a red slim bag about 4 feet long.  I think to myself...well if they are going to crack the glass, I could have done that myself.  Four of them surround the car, the fifth went back to the truck.  The project begins, one slides apart the rubber foam from the window while the other removed a long wiry thing with a loop at the bottom.  I notice they are trying to get the loop around the inside door handle.  The knob on the button has no way to grab hold of it, it is just a straight up knob, so they go for the inner door handle.

'Are you trying to pull the door handle?'  They look at me as if I were a DUMBASS, the Captain who is closest to me says 'Yes, we 'are' trying to open the door for you'.

'Oh, well, the car is manual, pulling on that won't open the door.  The only thing automatic about the car is the driver.'....................................took several seconds, then they grinned.  One of them then declared it impossible to open the car.  The one with the wiry hook wouldn't give up.  FINALLY, the door is opened and I am jumping up and down happy.

'Mam, I will need your name for our report.'

'Well, will you be posting to YouTube, if so then I will give you her name (pointing to my sister)'.  He grins and says 'No, it won't be on YouTube.'  I tell him my name...well the short version.  As he is walking away he turns and grins 'You can start checking Youtube tomorrow'.  I stopped grinning back.

I drove home the whole while thinking....I have to get a FUCKING spare key for this car!!!!!!

AndMore...Can I have a door?

About a month ago I had told my boss I wanted a door for my cube.  Tired of people just walking right on in while you are on the phone or in the middle of a thought for an email.  I was thinking of something like this:


The discussion was brief with my stating the door should have a slit for the extension of my desk, so it could open easily.

A month later.....Oh wait...there's a bit to add within that time frame.

Patient Zero


I developed a bit of a cold.  I went to the Dr. and was assured I can go back to work and just take some antibiotics for the sinus infection I also developed.  The next day (Tuesday) I went to work, by the afternoon I felt like death.  The cold worsened, the sinus worsened, I worsened.  I ended up taking the following two days off.

Can I have a WUSS WUSS

My co-workers like front line amateur soldiers began to fall.  One serious cold after another.  Blaming ME and dubbing me Patient Zero.  WUSSES all of THEM!

Personal stuff

Outside of work what could go wrong has gone wrong.  Name it and it has fallen apart.  I haven't the strength or the stomach to tackle any of it.

Commuting through the eighth circle of hell

3 trains and a total of 22 block walk each way doesn't have an improvement in sight.  Hostile commuters, delays, protesters, homeless.....oh wait....can't NOT share this one...

My child's last bottle of milk

On the R train a man with a stroller and a child about the age of 1 gets into the already packed train.  He begins to speak loudly "I apologize for the interruption, but this is my son and we are hungry.  I have not eaten in 20 hours and he is drinking his last bottle of milk".  People stood yelling "HERE, HERE" throwing cash, food and change when they couldn't reach him.  I missed my exit and had to stay on the train and re-route my way back.  I am not heartless, I just can't seem to release the vision of the $300 stroller, name brand diaper bag (with extra filled bottles) or his expensive wardrobe, than again who am I to judge.

back to eighth circle of hell...
This daily commute drains me.  In the morning I am drained by the time I get to the front gate at work.  At the end of the day I am drained and if I have an errand I must talk myself through the exhaustion and mantra myself to get the errand done without falling on my face.

This morning I get to work and this is what waits for me - my cube

Can't say my boss doesn't listen; he hand crafted this door from boxes, tape, print outs and effort.  The damn thing even has a slit and hinge effect.  Gotta love the effort.  The endless parading of co-workers and higher ups no less, making knocking sounds, using their devices to produce doorbell sounds (notice the doorbell on left) was priceless.


This is what does it for me.  Serenity!


This is what gets me through the eighth circle of hell commute, the hassles life throws me, the disappointments and horror people tend to impose and most of all...life.

Knowing that at the end of my morning trip I get to wonder what my boys are up to just perks me up.  The fact that I work in a place (lately) that no matter the horrors outside of the gate, humor is shared.... is PRICELESS.  I can forget my personal woes for a spell.  I can handle the stress the job brings, I can even forget for moments the commute knowing that Quarantine, Bloodboy, Waterford, Shrek (yes, I've named them) and the rest of the people at work have moments to spare to just give a laugh.  And in the most sadistic form provide a request for a door.

I don't know about you but I'll take the crazy door every single time.

Do you have a door waiting at the end of your eighth circle of hell?  Well...you can't have mine, get someone to build one for you!

AndMore...No greater enemy

There are times I truly believe there is no greater enemy to me then me.

Most of you have read the stories of accidental pain inflicted on myself.  For many years I was convinced my obituary would say 'died of accidental suicide'.

Well...let's get this over with

Scrappy nose
I have a terrible cold, the worst of it has passed but some of the congestion remains.  At one point for a few days I had the drips.  A constant flow to the nose that made me wonder why they haven't invented a tissue that you stuff up there and it continuously absorbs.  All the blowing of the nose left it scabby and/or peeling.

I went to upstate this weekend, a long overdue trip of just pure serene medicinal healing.  My uncle immediately noticed my nose and went into his McGyver mode.  He brought back an ointment, this thing is MAGIC.  I forgot the name but it sort of has the tingling of Vicks.  I put some on my nose and within hours the scaly effect was gone, a scab was healing.  MAGIC!  The next day my aunt and I were planning a small trip to a quaint town.  I mentioned how well the ointment worked and she suggested I put some more on.  I did.

It was time to get ready so I got my contacts (blind as a bat I am).  PAUSE

I have been wearing contacts for decades.  The rule of thumb is to always wash your hands.  But I had just taken a shower.  END OF PAUSE

I grab the contact for the right eye with my middle finger the way I always do, making sure to wet the finger well with the contact solution in the case.  I put the contact in and I felt a cool breeze in my eye...then...THE WORST FUCKING PAIN I EVER FELT.  FIRE!!! It felt as though a fire was lit on my eyeball.  The ointment on my hand!!!!  I tried to be silent and not let my aunt know what a Baboon I was.  I kept hearing the scream in my head FUCKING OW OW OW OW!!!!  SWEET JESUS, MARY AND JOSEPH WHY DO YOU LEAVE ME ALONE WITH MYSELF????????

With a small voice I commented "I amaze myself sometimes'.  My aunt looked at me and saw the stress in my eyeball...the truth is out.  You would think that was the end of the story...but....

I washed my hands took out the contacts rinsed it and started again, got it right and the left one too.  Now for makeup.  I put some moisturizer on my hands and began to put it on my face, rubbing it all on...all...over...my...face......  THE WORST FUCKING PAIN WAS BACK!!!!  SWEET JESUS, MARY AND JOSEPH the ointment on my nose is now all over my face and eyes.  FUCKING GREAT JUST FUCKING GREAT!!!!!  My aunt looks toward me to make sure all is ok, I gave the best smile I could muster and when she turned around I put my face in hands in utter disgust.

PLEASE...PLEASE...UNIVERSE!!! MAKE THE BURNING STOP!!!!!  It took some time but it did.  I put on a tad of mascara and left the rest to faith.  I brushed my hair the whole time thinking... WHY????

WHY??? I had just gotten over the razor pain!

Razor pain - note to self, don't shower without contacts on and attempt to shave.  I have cuts on legs and arm pits that would require several layers of neosporin after a strong dose of benadryl.  Come to think of it the mantra I had in the shower was similar 'OH MY FUCKING GOODNESS THAT WAS FLESH!!!!! FUCKING GREAT JUST GREAT!!!  And yet... I kept shaving.....

Who is my greatest enemy? Could it really be me?????

AndMore...Memory Foam bed disaster

I waited months.  Months to accumulate points, coupons and discounts.  No! Not for a flight, for the memory foam bed.  It's pretty close a months rent.

I finally order it and it will take 3 weeks to deliver.  It's not coming from a small underground factory in some remote region of the world.  Nope, its coming from US to US.  I wait.............(nails tapping).

It took TWO weeks, YAY!  I had it shipped elsewhere and got the call 'Your boxes came in and one looks large enough to hold a compressed memory foam bed'.

My son had borrowed my car as he is still looking for a job to hold him over until his deployment (who am I kidding...he also uses it to hang out, leaving me in an apartment where at one point re-flooring and painting was on the roommates mind...1/8 into the project the place looks like it was ransacked. (Well maybe not as bad as the pic above but darn close!)  The young!  They have no schedule in life.)  I stray.....

My son arrives with a friend and brings up the boxes, I have to take them home so I tell him 'Since the car is blocking a garage go downstairs, I just want to open the memory foam.  Online instructions said it could take up to 48 hours to decompress'.  He went off to stand guard of the car.


I open the box and see a rolled up item in a brown plastic bag.  'Good grief that is sucked in tight.'  I thought...out loud...to no one in particular.  Taking the brown plastic off the mattress was then secured in what I can best describe as Saran Wrap.  I unroll the wrap and the mattress balls back up.  'Damn, that thing is going to take at least a week to decompress. Up to 48 hours my ass."  If there are ghosts living in this apartment they sure get a chuckle out of me.

I unroll it again putting weight on the end and unfold it as it is in half lengthwise.  The 3 inch thickness is about an inch.  'Oh well, I will just have to let stand in a corner and wait.  Gotta go take the kids home.'

Next think I know I am flat on my back on the floor, my head having hit the door and the now mostly decompressed mattress on me.  No Swoosh sound, no indication whatsoever it would just pop like that.  I get up...I try to get up but my head hurts, my bum hurts, my back which was terrible beforehand is now in such pain.  I stand upright and decide to fake it.  As I go down the flight of stairs to go outside I could feel each pain of each step.  I take the boys to their hangout, stop at my sisters to drop off a dehumidifier that I am afraid will get ruined with the 10 minute a month repair project roommate (hey, $200 is a lot of money to waste), as she talks about plans for the weekend I don't hear much as my body is louder.....


'Are you F'ing nuts! Go home and chew on some Advil!' says the brain.
'If you thought the pain before was bad, how does THIS feel', says the back
'Well...after all the years of people saying you're a pain in the ass....' well, take a guess which said that.

I got home and was happy to find out that the mattress had no odor that the instructions said it may have.  I threw it on the bed, put covers on and showered, took some Advil and laid down.

OH MY GAWD!  (Actually I think I text that to someone last night).  It is AWESOME.  I slept like a baby, I woke up with no aches or pains (well, a slight bruise from the fall the night before).  Best purchase I made in years!!!!!

Saturday morning I sat out on the front stoop (as I normally do Saturday mornings to enjoy the ONE cup of caffeine I am allowed all day) and was just amazed at how refreshed I felt.


I learned a few things:
Don't believe all that is written in instructions
People really don't share the good stuff, NOW people are saying they have one and it's great
Wear protective armor when opening anything that decompresses
Make sure you are in a room big enough for decompression
No matter how exhausted, don't fall asleep with your glasses on

AndMore...The Bar Crawl rules

By definition -  A pub crawl (sometimes called a bar tour, bar crawl or bar-hopping) is the act of one or more people drinking in multiple pubs or bars in a single night, normally walking or busing to each one between drinking.

My first bar crawl was at the age of 21.  Some friends from work gathered (10 of us) and decided it was time.  Time for the bar crawl.  I was piled into one of 3 cars and we traveled to Boston, home of the Supervisor who left to make it big in the city.  I had a several others throughout the years with family or co-workers, friends or besties.

21st Birthday

We stayed at his family home who were on vacation for a month.  October is beautiful in Boston, they start up with the Halloween decoration early...at least back in the day.

Once all were rested we set out to find someplace to eat and set the rules.

The rules for that Bar Crawl night:

Birthday girl doesn't pay (nice)

All else had better have money for the crawl (I must admit the word crawl had me in fear, but I wasn't about to show that)

One drink per bar!

All must participate in getting to know people at the bar

No fighting

No talking politics or religion

No pick ups

No inter group pick ups (we would wake up in the same house)

What happens in Boston - stays in Boston

Bar crawls are not a constant event, just milestones in ones life

Birthday girl treats or cooks breakfast (again - nice)

We set out and to this day I can't remember how many bars we hit, there were many.  A cousin of the supervisor was designated driver.  An avid sober person that detested the taste of any alcohol.  Some parts of Boston has bars far off from another, which made the ride interesting.

I have tried to bring back the Bar crawl and the few times have been a failure ranging from bars closed to not being able to pick a city or state.

But the following list just made me think...better to leave that pleasurable event in the past. :-(

PEOPLE!

The ones that wait for the check to declare they are broke

The ones that go with an ulterior motive - never a good one

The ones that bitch and moan on location, when it's time to leave, etc.

The ones that drink like a fish at every bar

The ones that have a drinking problem (see drinks like a fish, closely related)

The ones that develop beer muscles, no one likes a grouch sober let along under the influence

The ones that think slurring and toppling = sexy; therefore dry humping with their eyes

The ones that think it's the best time to press upon their beliefs (no time is a good time for that crap)

The ones that leave a bad mark at the place causing all others to scratch it off the list

The ones that don't know when to stop drinking - saying I've had enough is a great sign for all to stop.  A good group would decide on a diner and ending the crawl with some laughs.

and the worst one.....

The ones that think they are on a permanent list to go to any bar crawl

Yup, I miss the days when people got together and stuck to a plan that did not entail taking anyone for granted or ruining what could be a great night.

This doesn't just go for bar crawls...pretty much any event can be ruined by not following simple lists that basically mean - be kind to one another.

Might as well leave it in the past where one can smile in memory and not feel as though the night was damned.