Midweek should be a victory feeling day. You have survived half the work week. But this is me we're talking about.
How do I feel?
I slept very little, no A/C at work gave me a fierce migraine which in turn made me nauseous. I got up after feeling like the few hours I did sleep. There was some trash to throw so I thought I would take it with me, run to the back of the house, dump it and run to the train station across the street. I had 5 minutes before the train would arrive.
What the F was in that bin?
The landlord has built a wooden encasement for the trash cans. Each bin having it's own lid. Recycling is made easy with several bins. I run down the stairs and to the back. Two small garbage bags in one hand, a purse and my lunch bag in the other. I had one finger extended to lift the bin and once I did a long pink tail poked out. Wiggled slightly and made me SCREECH! I let go of the bin handle and heard some serious rambling going on in the wooden encasement, sure that the creature was hopping from can to can. I THREW the small garbage bags, turned to run. While running toward the station I got my cell phone out and managed to text my landlord. 'I left some trash bags on the bins. Large animal inside bins. Don't know what kind of animal. GOOD LUCK!
Go toe yourself
I got to the train just in time. They never wait, as soon as all the people on the platform enter the doors close. I amaze myself at the speed I ran and at the accuracy of my text spelling while running.
I sat trying to catch my breath, fighting the nauseousness that was still lingering from the day before, hoping the A/C at work would be fixed. As I took in deep breaths I felt as though I were breathing in alcohol. I looked to my right and had to blink hard. Surely I am finally going over the deep end. Right there across from me in the train car was a woman in clothes one would wear to a club. She looked to be in her 30s and trying to hang on to her 20s. The shimmering clothes were making me dizzy. What really floored me was what she was doing. She was painting her toe nails with sparkly black nail polish. One foot on the seats across from her, just stroking the brush as if she were in her own living room. For a second I truly thought she was that Housewives of NJ, the one that sold a cook book and over turned a table in a fit of rage..
The train stopped and some people came on board. A woman sat directly across from me, she began to sniff the air like a well trained dog. 'Oh HELL no' is all I heard. At that point the conductor came into the car to collect tickets, she too sniff loudly. Found the culprit and the DRAMA began.... although told to stop, she insisted she only had one more foot to go and only 4 toes since she did 'the big one'. While arguing she completed her task and finally put the offending polish away.
Hair! this is for you
For the rest of the train ride she spent her time twee-zing her brows. Occasionally blowing the plucked eyebrow hairs toward the middle (aisle).
Great balls of fire
I got to work and what do you know the A/C is still broken. It was cooler outside. So.....I have a migraine, I'm nauseous, I'm still wondering if the Possum was in the bins and I'm melting.
Summary
Dante was psychic and when he wrote Dante's Inferno he was having visions of my life.
How do I feel?
I slept very little, no A/C at work gave me a fierce migraine which in turn made me nauseous. I got up after feeling like the few hours I did sleep. There was some trash to throw so I thought I would take it with me, run to the back of the house, dump it and run to the train station across the street. I had 5 minutes before the train would arrive.
What the F was in that bin?
The landlord has built a wooden encasement for the trash cans. Each bin having it's own lid. Recycling is made easy with several bins. I run down the stairs and to the back. Two small garbage bags in one hand, a purse and my lunch bag in the other. I had one finger extended to lift the bin and once I did a long pink tail poked out. Wiggled slightly and made me SCREECH! I let go of the bin handle and heard some serious rambling going on in the wooden encasement, sure that the creature was hopping from can to can. I THREW the small garbage bags, turned to run. While running toward the station I got my cell phone out and managed to text my landlord. 'I left some trash bags on the bins. Large animal inside bins. Don't know what kind of animal. GOOD LUCK!
Go toe yourself
I got to the train just in time. They never wait, as soon as all the people on the platform enter the doors close. I amaze myself at the speed I ran and at the accuracy of my text spelling while running.
I sat trying to catch my breath, fighting the nauseousness that was still lingering from the day before, hoping the A/C at work would be fixed. As I took in deep breaths I felt as though I were breathing in alcohol. I looked to my right and had to blink hard. Surely I am finally going over the deep end. Right there across from me in the train car was a woman in clothes one would wear to a club. She looked to be in her 30s and trying to hang on to her 20s. The shimmering clothes were making me dizzy. What really floored me was what she was doing. She was painting her toe nails with sparkly black nail polish. One foot on the seats across from her, just stroking the brush as if she were in her own living room. For a second I truly thought she was that Housewives of NJ, the one that sold a cook book and over turned a table in a fit of rage..
The train stopped and some people came on board. A woman sat directly across from me, she began to sniff the air like a well trained dog. 'Oh HELL no' is all I heard. At that point the conductor came into the car to collect tickets, she too sniff loudly. Found the culprit and the DRAMA began.... although told to stop, she insisted she only had one more foot to go and only 4 toes since she did 'the big one'. While arguing she completed her task and finally put the offending polish away.
Hair! this is for you
For the rest of the train ride she spent her time twee-zing her brows. Occasionally blowing the plucked eyebrow hairs toward the middle (aisle).
Great balls of fire
I got to work and what do you know the A/C is still broken. It was cooler outside. So.....I have a migraine, I'm nauseous, I'm still wondering if the Possum was in the bins and I'm melting.
Summary
Dante was psychic and when he wrote Dante's Inferno he was having visions of my life.
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