Initially Thanksgiving started pretty bad or at least the day before. I went home with a migraine and just about given up with humanity.
In the late evening I went outside with a cup of coffee and a cigarette. Time to relax and try to think of nothing and no one.
A beautiful little kitten was about 10 feet away. The sweetest little purr could be heard. He would wind about rubbing along the edge of the concrete stair from the house next door. Clearly showing his discontent about the lack of affection. I spent several minutes puckering up making the kiss kiss sound, a few hushed pssssssst while extending my hand. He just teased taking a step then stopping, giving that slight sweet purr. Eventually he came right up to me, I was sitting on the concrete stoop, extending my hand further so he could take a friendly whiff............when...........FUCKING CUJO came out of that kitten. HISSING and SNARLING, swatting with extended CLAWS. WHAT THE FUCK??????
I'm not ashamed to admit I picked up my cup and ran up the stairs, slamming the hallway door shut while out of breath. The FUCKING MANIAC CAT was still out there HISSING. BASTARD!!!
The next day was calm enough for a Thanksgiving, I treated myself to a matinee - TWILIGHT!!! Now that just perked me for the day.
FRIDAY - I visited my sister and in the evening she packed some food for me to take home. I put the food in the car along with my purse and turned on the car to warm it up a bit. I went back for a piece of cake that I forgot on the counter. I walked to the car only to find I had locked it...with the car on...and all my things in it. PAUSE...
PAUSE REASON - I have a Chevy Aveo, my recommendation to anyone is to NEVER get a Chevy Aveo. The parts are from Mars. It took 9 months to get a mirror to replace the cracked one (damn hooker) from the driver side. NO ONE had the mirror, maybe the model from the year before or after but not the 2009. Well...try getting a fucking spare key for that car. The car has an automatic transmission, anything else automatic stops there. The key is not electronic, nor does it have any chip. It is just a key. Apparently locksmiths, Lowe's, Walmart and a ton of other places do not have the blank key to make a spare. The dealer wants $125...for a key....for a FUCKING key. END OF PAUSE
I panic, I have no spare, low gas and no way to get in. I haven't renewed the AAA (was waiting on the new year, thank you recession). I was seriously contemplating breaking a back window and asked my sister 'how much do you think that will cost?' It's Black Friday and no 24 hour service available in the area. I call a friend, for some reason he always has an answer and if not he has a way of calming my madness. He said to call the police but not to dial 911. PAUSE
PAUSE REASON - POLICE????? Anyone who has read my writings for the past few years know I have a bad history with police. Not that I am a criminal but I just don't have the best luck with interacting with them. But... I need to get in my car. END OF PAUSE
I suck in my cowardice at calling, straighten my back and I hand my sister her phone back (mine is in the locked car) and ask her to call (grins). The police transfer her to the Fire Department as they are equipped to get into cars.
A few minutes later we hear the rumblings of a truck. My sister says in a hushed voice 'oh shit, they are coming with the large fire truck.' I say 'For my little car?' Coming down the quiet, dark street is a rather large fire truck...loudly coming closer.
FIVE fire men get out of the truck and open all kinds of doors and panels. One of them Le Captain I presume, walks over hands in pockets. "Oh, AND the car is on.' To which I replied....'well I wanted to warm up the car, it's really warm now, can you open it?' (See why it's not a good idea for me to call the cops?)
They come close to the car with a red slim bag about 4 feet long. I think to myself...well if they are going to crack the glass, I could have done that myself. Four of them surround the car, the fifth went back to the truck. The project begins, one slides apart the rubber foam from the window while the other removed a long wiry thing with a loop at the bottom. I notice they are trying to get the loop around the inside door handle. The knob on the button has no way to grab hold of it, it is just a straight up knob, so they go for the inner door handle.
'Are you trying to pull the door handle?' They look at me as if I were a DUMBASS, the Captain who is closest to me says 'Yes, we 'are' trying to open the door for you'.
'Oh, well, the car is manual, pulling on that won't open the door. The only thing automatic about the car is the driver.'....................................took several seconds, then they grinned. One of them then declared it impossible to open the car. The one with the wiry hook wouldn't give up. FINALLY, the door is opened and I am jumping up and down happy.
'Mam, I will need your name for our report.'
'Well, will you be posting to YouTube, if so then I will give you her name (pointing to my sister)'. He grins and says 'No, it won't be on YouTube.' I tell him my name...well the short version. As he is walking away he turns and grins 'You can start checking Youtube tomorrow'. I stopped grinning back.
I drove home the whole while thinking....I have to get a FUCKING spare key for this car!!!!!!
In the late evening I went outside with a cup of coffee and a cigarette. Time to relax and try to think of nothing and no one.
A beautiful little kitten was about 10 feet away. The sweetest little purr could be heard. He would wind about rubbing along the edge of the concrete stair from the house next door. Clearly showing his discontent about the lack of affection. I spent several minutes puckering up making the kiss kiss sound, a few hushed pssssssst while extending my hand. He just teased taking a step then stopping, giving that slight sweet purr. Eventually he came right up to me, I was sitting on the concrete stoop, extending my hand further so he could take a friendly whiff............when...........FUCKING CUJO came out of that kitten. HISSING and SNARLING, swatting with extended CLAWS. WHAT THE FUCK??????
I'm not ashamed to admit I picked up my cup and ran up the stairs, slamming the hallway door shut while out of breath. The FUCKING MANIAC CAT was still out there HISSING. BASTARD!!!
The next day was calm enough for a Thanksgiving, I treated myself to a matinee - TWILIGHT!!! Now that just perked me for the day.
FRIDAY - I visited my sister and in the evening she packed some food for me to take home. I put the food in the car along with my purse and turned on the car to warm it up a bit. I went back for a piece of cake that I forgot on the counter. I walked to the car only to find I had locked it...with the car on...and all my things in it. PAUSE...
PAUSE REASON - I have a Chevy Aveo, my recommendation to anyone is to NEVER get a Chevy Aveo. The parts are from Mars. It took 9 months to get a mirror to replace the cracked one (damn hooker) from the driver side. NO ONE had the mirror, maybe the model from the year before or after but not the 2009. Well...try getting a fucking spare key for that car. The car has an automatic transmission, anything else automatic stops there. The key is not electronic, nor does it have any chip. It is just a key. Apparently locksmiths, Lowe's, Walmart and a ton of other places do not have the blank key to make a spare. The dealer wants $125...for a key....for a FUCKING key. END OF PAUSE
I panic, I have no spare, low gas and no way to get in. I haven't renewed the AAA (was waiting on the new year, thank you recession). I was seriously contemplating breaking a back window and asked my sister 'how much do you think that will cost?' It's Black Friday and no 24 hour service available in the area. I call a friend, for some reason he always has an answer and if not he has a way of calming my madness. He said to call the police but not to dial 911. PAUSE
PAUSE REASON - POLICE????? Anyone who has read my writings for the past few years know I have a bad history with police. Not that I am a criminal but I just don't have the best luck with interacting with them. But... I need to get in my car. END OF PAUSE
I suck in my cowardice at calling, straighten my back and I hand my sister her phone back (mine is in the locked car) and ask her to call (grins). The police transfer her to the Fire Department as they are equipped to get into cars.
A few minutes later we hear the rumblings of a truck. My sister says in a hushed voice 'oh shit, they are coming with the large fire truck.' I say 'For my little car?' Coming down the quiet, dark street is a rather large fire truck...loudly coming closer.
FIVE fire men get out of the truck and open all kinds of doors and panels. One of them Le Captain I presume, walks over hands in pockets. "Oh, AND the car is on.' To which I replied....'well I wanted to warm up the car, it's really warm now, can you open it?' (See why it's not a good idea for me to call the cops?)
They come close to the car with a red slim bag about 4 feet long. I think to myself...well if they are going to crack the glass, I could have done that myself. Four of them surround the car, the fifth went back to the truck. The project begins, one slides apart the rubber foam from the window while the other removed a long wiry thing with a loop at the bottom. I notice they are trying to get the loop around the inside door handle. The knob on the button has no way to grab hold of it, it is just a straight up knob, so they go for the inner door handle.
'Are you trying to pull the door handle?' They look at me as if I were a DUMBASS, the Captain who is closest to me says 'Yes, we 'are' trying to open the door for you'.
'Oh, well, the car is manual, pulling on that won't open the door. The only thing automatic about the car is the driver.'....................................took several seconds, then they grinned. One of them then declared it impossible to open the car. The one with the wiry hook wouldn't give up. FINALLY, the door is opened and I am jumping up and down happy.
'Mam, I will need your name for our report.'
'Well, will you be posting to YouTube, if so then I will give you her name (pointing to my sister)'. He grins and says 'No, it won't be on YouTube.' I tell him my name...well the short version. As he is walking away he turns and grins 'You can start checking Youtube tomorrow'. I stopped grinning back.
I drove home the whole while thinking....I have to get a FUCKING spare key for this car!!!!!!
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